I’ve spent a good deal of this year listening to Kesha’s Rainbow album. Around the time of my hen do in February, I was obsessed with the song ‘Woman’; at our wedding, ‘Finding You’ was one of the songs on our playlist during the reception; on our honeymoon, we listened to ‘Boots’ whilst driving around Joshua Tree on our Cali road trip; and whilst I was stuck at home post-surgery after badly breaking my wrist, ‘Rainbow’ helped me to look on the bright side. One of the lines from the song has stuck with me since, and is just perfect for today’s post…”Darling, our scars make us who we are.”
Dress: Nasty Gal
Shoes: Primark (similar from Underground)
Belt: Similar from Superdry (borrowed/stolen from my husband, haha!)
If you want to know the full story behind how I broke my wrist whilst away in Turkey, there’s a full video about it on my YouTube channel. When I went into surgery, I had no idea how badly scarred I’d be afterwards (I was limited in what I could ask the hospital staff due to the language barrier). The first time my dressing was changed and I saw my wrist, I knew it wasn’t going to be a subtle little mark, but something pretty prominent that would be with me forever. It’s important to say that it has only been 6 months since my surgery, and I know the scar will mature and fade. But it has been quite an adjustment for me, especially as so much of my work involves my appearance.
When I was first able to remove my splint and have my wrist out and about again, it was surprising to find out how unsubtle people are when it comes to commenting on things like a scar. I had everything from random enquires as to what happened from near-strangers to reactions of “WOAH that’s massive!” from friends who saw it for the first time. The latter I don’t mind (I prefer my friends to be honest, and would have been more annoyed if they lied and pretended it was nothing!) and the former is to be expected occasionally I guess, but the fact is that there’s no hiding it. At least not for me, anyway.
The first thing people say to me about my scar now? “You could get a tattoo to cover it up someday!’. It’s something that’s gone through my mind quite a few times, even very recently, but I don’t think it’s something I’m going to do. I’ve been trying lots of things to help to reduce the appearance of it, from Bio Oil to a gel called ScarSil, and it’s very slowly starting to look a little less prominent. But just lately I’ve been looking at the scar in a different way. I didn’t choose it, but whether I like it or not it is part of me. There’s a story behind it, and I learnt a hell of a lot from the experience too; the things we go through, however big or small they may be, help to shape us as people.
Whilst I wouldn’t care to repeat my accident, there have been some positives to come out of it all. I don’t take for granted what my body can do on a daily basis, from my workouts to simple tasks like opening heavy doors, juggling my camera or even typing. I got to see how much people in my life care for me, from my sister who was my complete hero whilst we were in Turkey to my husband who looked after me once I was home, and the friends who came to visit me whilst I was recovering. I discovered that I have a crazy high pain threshold, and that there’s always a way around something if you’re determined (I have always been headstrong but it took on a whole new meaning for me this summer!).
If you’re reading this post wondering how to embrace your scars, however you’ve acquired them, here are a few of the things that have helped me out…
- Never forget the positives. Scars are usually the result of some kind of trauma, but the fact is you’re still here. You’re alive, and your scars tell only the story of the past. What happens next is up to you, and there are always positives to hold on to. Whilst my scar is the result of a physical injury, there is something that I would like to address with this point too; the subject of scars can sometimes relate to mental health, but please know that there are always people to talk to, like the amazing charity Mind. You are never alone.
- Treat yourself. To a little of whatever make you feel good. For me, as a fashion blogger, that meant some new clothes and accessories to stop me from hiding away. It was a temptation for a while, but I made the conscious decision to go the other way and start creating more content than ever before. I don’t want my scar to change what I do, so if it’s in a picture, it’s in a picture. It’s part of me!
- Trust the process. I know that my scar isn’t in its final form, and that it will fade over time. But this is where I’m currently at, and that’s OK! Our bodies are amazing, and their ability to heal is unbelievable. In a year’s time I might be posting outfit photos where my scar is hardly visible, or it might always stand out. I’ve got to see what happens in time, and go from there.
Do you have any scars? How did you adjust to them being part of you?