Dealing With A Total Style Rut

I am in a style rut. There’s no two ways to put it – I’m having one of those moments (weeks…months?) where I can’t stand how I look in anything, and just want to start from scratch. It sounds like such a silly, whiny non-problem, but when so much of what you do involves your appearance, it can really start to get you down.

I’ve always had a bit of a style battle on my hands. I went from being an awkward tomboy who wouldn’t even wear a dress to my mum’s wedding (I insisted on a white suit…kind of chic when I think about it), to an alternative teenager who shunned the high street for punk-inspired indie stores (see the photo below!), to a slightly lost 24-year old who doesn’t feel like she fits in anywhere when it comes to fashion. I have my favourite brands, like Black Milk (whose clothes make me feel super sassy) but aside from that, I tend to struggle. I feel that nothing really suits me, and my wardrobe is almost exclusively black-and-white.

Chyaz Alternative Style

The thing is, I know what I like in my own mind. But when it comes to trying on clothes, or putting together an outfit, I have a total brain meltdown. I tend to get obsessed with one particular item (at the moment it’s this black blazer from Dorothy Perkins – it’s lovely, but not exactly mind-blowing) and wear it to death. Picking an outfit for an occasion sends me into meltdown, and I inevitably go for something boring each time. The thing is…I’m not a boring person. At all. So why can’t my style reflect my personality?

I think some of it is to do with the annoying, freezing cold weather we’re having at the moment. I hate being cold so just go for comfy options, which feels nice for a while but quickly makes me feel frumpy. In the summer I’m much more daring, and my rock-inspired style comes out more, but I still feel I want to mix it up a little. I know what I want to do…it’s just a case of getting there.

Chyaz Black Milk Westerns

So what I’d really love is to hear your thoughts – how do you get out of a style rut? If you’ve read my blog or watched my videos before, what would you recommend for me to try out? Any help or advice would mean the world to me!

I’ll get there, and when I do I want to be able to post so much more about my style here on my blog. I just hope that time hurries itself up!

Stay Creative,

Chyaz xox

14 Comments

  1. Kerry

    I’m sorry I have no advice but I understand what it’s like to know how you want to look/dress but not quite able to get there.
    There are so many clothing items/styles I want to wear because they look good and reflect my feelings inside but I feel extremely uncomfortable in anything other than dark plain leggings and t shirts because I feel like I’m too fat for anything else.
    I feel like everyone is looking at me and thinking omg how has she let herself get so fat and thinks it’s ok to wear those clothes.
    I’m 5ft 5in and a size 10/12 which I know isn’t huge but my stomach sticks out so much I can not wear anything remotely fitted.
    I’m going to the gym 5 days a week and eating very healthy but the weight just won’t come off fast enough and it feels like I’m not doing it right even though im doing everything you’re suppsed to do and have been for months now.

    • I really understand – I have been much less healthy just lately and it’s made me feel really uncomfortable about myself. All I can say if that you will feel better about yourself, I promise. We’re always our own worst critics, and I always find that when I feel good about my health/fitness levels everything else falls into place. We’ll get there lovely! xx

  2. BestDamnSmile

    Chyaz, I’m sure it’s the cold winter weather, at least I like to think that is the reason! I know exactly what it feels like. I especially hate the part when I’m walking in the street and I feel so uncomfortable in my clothes and everyone else just looks fab, and I have no idea how they do it… 😀 I’m actually in the same style rut as you are right now. So I decided to go on a shopping spree last week and get some new clothes to get me out of mine. I ended up getting a totally simple black dress and a light blue cardigan. BUT I also did get a red dress, which is crazy, because I’ve never owned a red dress, or anything red really for that matter – note: everyone in the office really liked it on me and said I should wear bright colours more often. I also had to really moderate myself not to get a grey or black cardigan, so I got the light blue one. It actually goes really well with my old, plain black and white clothes. So I decided that’s what I was going to do from now on until I find my style and feel comfortable again. I’ll continue to challenge myself and get colours I wouldn’t normally go with and try combining them with my old style. 🙂
    Good luck girl. 🙂

    • Thank you so much for your comment!! I feel exactly the same as you at the moment, and absolutely love your advice – I’m going to head to the shops today and see if I can pick up a few more colourful things 🙂 xxx

  3. Lior

    I really understand you.
    Up until 2 and a half years ago I was in a school where we has school uniforms so I wasn’t required to do much styling, but once I went to University I felt like I was lost. I had an idea of how I wanted to look but I was completely lost getting there…
    I’m still not 100% sure with how I dress and every few months I change it up a bit. But, my advice, as silly as it sounds, is go with what you feel. For example, I had no idea how to walk on heels (seriously, it was ridiculous), but they always made me feel more feminine and more happy about my look, so even though I still struggle with them, I still walk on them because they make me feel good. You should do whatever makes you feel good. And just to let you know, I’ve been watching your videos for a while, and I don’t think you dress boring AT ALL! I absolutely love your style and what you project to the world 🙂
    with lots of love,
    Lior.

    • Aww thank you Lior! I remember feeling really lost style-wise at university, I felt like everyone looked really cool and I felt like a potato!! But your advice about doing what makes you feel good is awesome, because at the end of the day if you feel comfortable and confident in something it really does show. Your comment made me smile so much, thanks again 🙂 xx

  4. Alessa Peters

    Hey! First of all, I love your style! Especially all those fancy dresses and shoes, but I often thought “I would never wear stuff like that” since I can’t think of the right occasions to do so. Maybe you need to slow done a little bit. Don’t get me wrong, I love your dresses and shoes as I said, but during the colder seasons everyone turns to a black, grey, dark colours kind of person. So it often feels comfortabled to fit in and wear black, grey and other darks as well. You don’t want to get attention all the time, sometimes it’s nice to just hide between the common sense of style. I think it could make you feel more comfortable if you layered your awesome dresses with a pair of leggings and stuff. I know this isn’t mindblowing or anything new, but have you considered wearing your dresses as skirts? If you take a fancy dress, which is obviously to cold for our climate, just wear leggings and boots underneath and a nice, yet simple sweater on top. Leggings, boots and sweater should be out of the “hiding” colour range like black, grey, brown, white… but kind of matching with the dress. You could pair the map dress above with very dark denim or even black leggings and a nude sweater (colurs match with the land part of the map), put a blue scarf on top and you are good to go. And there you go, cute, warm, comfy and a sparkle of Chyaz on top. Since most of your dresses are cutted quite simple this should work with most of them.

    • I LOVE the idea of wearing the dresses as skirts!! I’ve considered it in passing but I’ve never actually tried it out, so you’ve really inspired me to have a go – I’m going to team one of my Black Milk dresses with a cropped jumper today and see what I looks like 🙂 thank you so much, I really appreciate your help! xx

  5. Kathleen

    Maybe buy more “statement items” or mix and match what you have in a way that makes a statement. For example, my style is kind of a mixture of alternative, biker stuff, and comfortable things like t-shirts. However, occasionally I’ll wear a really pretty, girly sundress and pair it with chunky combat boots. I love the look, and I get a ton of compliments/comments when I wear an outfit like that. Perhaps you could wear something that you wouldn’t normally wear, and pair it with an item that completely reflects your style. Just a suggestion!

    • Awesome advice!! I think I’m going to get a couple of totally different pieces and mix them into my style like you mentioned, it’s a great way to change things up without committing to one particular style. Thanks so much! xx

  6. Rhiannon

    Black milk skater dress. Wooly tights. Black cardigan. Boots or trainers. Easy winter wear.
    Also, don’t you have some burned cheetah leggings? What about wearing those with pink tights underneath for extra warmth?
    Much love! xx

  7. Fanni B.

    In winter I always feel like I am very old-fashioned, because the fasionable clothes aren’t warm enough in the cold weather. I have to wear thick tights, but I can’t pull tight jeans or another type of trousers over them. I have a classmate girl, who always wears leggings,thin material T-shirts or blouses and she is always ill because of it.

    Other thing: fashionable clothes aren’t fit everyone. Try them and choose those ones which make you feel good and beatiful. 😀

    I love the dress and the boots in the 1st picture ^^

  8. Ericka

    Ah you and me both! I was always a graphic T and Jeans person because my shirts allowed me to show off my fandoms. However, I went to Japan last summer and dressed quite nice (skirts and dresses) every day there. And ever since I have found my Tshirt and jeans look to be so … nerdy I guess. And I really want to look pretty and feminine. However I dont feel like I own much of anything to reflect that. And I hate repeating outfits (as bad as that sounds) so I feel like I run out of options real fast. Some mornings I do that cliche thing where I throw my mountains of clothes on the floor and whine that I have nothing to wear. However that is when I think about what it is I am wanting and lacking. Atm it is sweaters. I own a lot of hoodies and they have always done me well but I have very few like fashion-ee sweaters to pair with leggings (which previously I only had 2 pairs of). So now when I go shopping, I try to keep my eyes open for more clothes like that. So for now I feel like I have a bit more options. So I guess my advice is to try and pay attention to what it is you want, and then go and buy it.

  9. Nat

    Honestly I’m in the same frame of mind at the moment and I don’t even know what to do about it…

    To be honest I think your sense in fashion is amazing and you’re a big inspiration!

    If you’re not sure what sort of clothing you wanna wear, maybe check Lookbook and Tumblr fashion blogs? I used to use this ages ago and is what I’ll start using again to gain some more fashion inspiration. 🙂

    https://theremightbecoffee.wordpress.com/

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